Writing

The Walk (a poem)

April 29, 2020 // Esther Filbrun Leave a Comment

I loved watching all the colors
As they shifted through the day:
Sometimes gloomy, sometimes brilliant,
All spectacular in their own way.
And I couldn’t hold out much longer,
Had to go, enjoy the sun,
So I took my little sister
In the pram—and oh what fun!

She held on, small fists grasping
To the edges of her seat,
Small eyes seeking out the different
Points of interest we did meet.
We saw waving maple branches,
Heard the rushing of the creek,
Wandered past the hills of gravel,
Stared at all the cows and sheep.

It was glorious in the sunshine,
Though the wind was slightly cold,
But the moments spent together
Flitted past on wings of gold.
Then the home stretch soon we wandered,
Looking forward to a treat,
Baby snuggled in her blankets
Me? I had to use my feet.

“Ho!” A neighbor spied us, greeting,
“How are you on this fine day?”
“Doing well!” My part returning,
“I’m so glad the sky’s not gray!”
“I am too,” was his rejoinder,
As he worked to clear some leaves,
“And,” he wondered, slightly bending,
“Are you living out your dreams?”

What a question to ask a stranger!
I paused then to think it through.
“Yes I am,” I called back to him,
Thankful, realizing I do.
It was odd, I mused later,
As we bumped along the street,
The kinds of questions you can put to
A mere stranger that you meet.

But—’tis true, I knew with wonder
As we turned and saw our lane,
Though my life may not be perfect,
That doesn’t make the truth less plain.
I am living out my dream now—
Yes, though it may not seem much.
Where’re Christ leads, ’tis all and more
Than any dream that I could clutch.

I may wish for greater riches,
Or for people I count dear,
But the greatest dream of all
Is one I hold—already here.
I have Jesus; He is much more
Than any momentary dream,
And in walking, trusting, holding,
He’s the one that makes me sing.

This poem is almost exactly the way it happened last Friday on a walk with my youngest sister, aside from the fact that the conversation with the neighbor was only a “hello!” and his question about if I’m living out my dream. When I got home, I was inspired to turn the incident into poetry.

Lockdown Ramblings and a New Writer’s Tool (Freebie!)

April 7, 2020 // Esther Filbrun Leave a Comment

Well, it’s certainly been an interesting two weeks! After watching all the quarantine notices throughout the States, I wondered how long it would take for that to come to New Zealand. And just a week or week and a half later from when I first heard about it from friends over there, we were notified that New Zealand was to go under lockdown for four weeks. Today is day 13 of lockdown here; we’ve had two Sundays at home now.

As I mentioned in one of my last posts, I was supposed to go stay with some friends for six weeks while the mother recovered from surgery. I had my bags packed, some by the door, others waiting on the blue table under my window, ten minutes away from when I was planning to leave. And I got a phone call—the surgery had been postponed. So, instead of driving three or four hours that afternoon, I got to unpack everything (but I did list everything I had packed in Workflowy, where I normally keep a packing list), and then got to work at resetting my brain for “lockdown with the family” mode.

I’m so thankful I get to be with everyone during this time—both Dad and my oldest brother are off work, so we’re all here together. It’s been great to just enjoy spending time together! We’ve played games, worked up boxes and boxes of apples into applesauce, canned several boxes of tomatoes, and overall just enjoyed the chance to have undivided time together. We also have a new routine going, which I think all of us are enjoying!

Lockdown Ramblings and a New Writer's Tool (Freebie!) — One thing we’ve enjoyed doing as a family is having a sausage roast by a nearby creek for Sunday lunch. This was one of the views I spotted on our way home last Sunday!

One thing I was hoping for, which hasn’t happened yet, is extra creative time. I’ve spent a lot of afternoons lately working on some sort of preserving job, so I haven’t had as much time as I was hoping.

I did get one thing done, though—a writing tracker I’ve been dreaming of for months now! There’s a writer’s event called the 2020 Author Olympics (supposed to run during the Olympics, but you know…that’s not going to happen this year). It’ll be running from April 15-28, and as always, I’m excited to participate. I did sign up for Camp NaNo this month, too, but well…I haven’t started writing yet, and it’s the 7th already. Planning ahead is helpful, y’all. I should have, and didn’t, and I’m regretting it now.

With the Author Olympics coming up, though, I decided to get the writing tracker finished so I could share it with writers there. And then I thought—why not share it here, too? Here’s the description I shared in the Facebook group (and please join us there, if you’re interested in doing creative writing during lockdown; the more people, the better!):

I used a writing tracker like this during NaNoWriMo last year, and found it super helpful, fun, and motivating, but have made quite a few improvements to it since then.

There are three versions here: A 10k – 100k section, with 500 words per space, a 5k – 50k section, with 250 words per space (for those of us who are slower writers!), and a section with just the blank divided up spirals, for those of us who want to make our own goals (editing, anyone? this might be helpful!).

The pages are letter-sized, but the trackers themselves are in a half-letter size (I find that the most useful personally; it’s the right size to trim down and glue into my bullet journal). Feel free to print out any or all that could be useful to you! And enjoy the quotes, too—just a random collection of different inspiring/thought-provoking ones I’ve picked up over the years!

If you would like a version without quotes and/or see any typos, please let me know. I’m happy to fix and re-upload them.

And feel free to share this with anyone inside or outside this group who might find this helpful!

I’ve included three versions in the Drive file: The half-letter size I referenced above, an A5 version, and one I designed to fit in my Leuchtturm Bullet Journal (because, yes, neither the A5 or the half-size will fit quite the way I want it to in there). Get them here:

View/Download All Three Versions | Half-Letter Size | A5 Size | Leuchtturm (Bullet Journal) Size

I hope it’s helpful for you! And if you have any questions, please ask.

This afternoon, I’m hoping I can spend some time listing all the stories I’ve written over the past 8-10 years that I want to edit. I know there are several that I’ve forgotten in that time; a few months ago, I was trying to count up how many stories I’ve written that are 10,000 words or larger, and Mom reminded me of one I’d missed that I wrote last year—so I think it’s about time to go back and make a list! It will be hard to decide which one to work on first, though.

I hope you’re having a productive time during this lockdown, and hopefully, you’re with your family! Whatever you are doing, I hope you are keeping your eyes on Jesus. He is worthy.

What projects have you been working on these past few weeks?

The Five Minute Tip

January 16, 2020 // Esther Filbrun Leave a Comment

One of the most lasting things I learned from NaNoWriMo in November was how much writing I could accomplish in just five minutes. So today, I’d like to share a simple tip that you’ve probably heard before, but I was reminded of again and have found it so very, very helpful over the past few months!

Set a timer for five minutes, and write as fast as you can in that time.

One of this morning’s tasks was looking for new replacement book covers for a project that I’ve been working on for the last 3-4 years—a complete upgrade and refresh of my book reviews website. It’s a massive job, and I haven’t gotten nearly as far with it as I would have liked, but that’s one of my goals for the year, so I’m tackling it again. Over this last week, I’ve gained a bit of clarity as far as what I can do now while I wait for several other things to fall into place, so I have a bit more steam to push ahead.

While I was looking for covers, I happened to see a search result come up from the current website—and the description of that particular result was my author bio. Which reminds me that I need to put together a quick description for that particular search function on the new website, to be more helpful to the end-user searcher . . . . #SolopreneurDoesItAll

Okay, that’s noted in my ever-increasing list of things to do before launch day.

The Five Minute Tip — We’ve had some gorgeous sunsets this last little while thanks to the smoke from the Australian bushfires!

Now, where was I? Oh, yes. So this bio said something like “I’m the girl who decided to write uninspired reviews instead of inspired fiction.” Something along those lines, anyway—and when I saw it, I remembered how it was something of a personal joke to me at the time. That was my trade-off then, as I put all my writing energy into the website and left the side of me that loves writing fiction in the dust.

But, when I saw that, I realized that’s not me anymore. I’ve come to the place where even though we’re still posting at least three reviews per week on there, and I’m still writing quite a bit for it, fiction writing has its place in my life again.

It’s not big, or grand, but it’s there—and like I proved to myself last November, it’s still vastly important to me. It was important enough to keep writing even while I was taking three trips, losing sleep in preference to writing, and trying to balance my other responsibilities here at home and on the reviews website. Some things fell through the cracks, yes, but this is one thing that isn’t as much on the back burner now as it used to be.

And I’m so very, very thankful!

At this point, I have a daily commitment to write at least a little each day in or for a fictional story. One thing that has helped me with this is a five-minute timer.

This morning, before I sat down to write this blog post, I set the timer for five minutes and wrote in my Biblical historical fiction story. I only got about 160 words in that time, but often I can get up to about 210 or 230 words—I had a bit of research to do before I could continue with that particular scene. I didn’t particularly want to do it then, because I wanted to get on with other things, but since that’s my daily commitment, and told myself I only had to write for those five minutes, I was able to get it done.

Little things, people. Change those little things to give you momentum for the big. You never know—you might end up with a novel at the end of it—as I’m expecting to have in another month or two when I finally get this thing finished! I’m at 60k now . . . and am a little scared to think of how much it will likely be before I’m done!

So yes, I’m writing fiction again—more than I ever used to. Along with trying to keep up with reviews for the website. And I’m thankful to have been given the chance to do both!

Now I need to figure out if it’s possible to edit a novel in just five minutes per day . . . (I think it must be).

Let’s discuss: What little tips like this have made a big difference for you? Are you trying to prioritize something a bit more now than you have in the past, or have you had to put something on the back burner for a while?

NaNoWriMo 2019

December 13, 2019 // Esther Filbrun Leave a Comment

I have a little picture filed away above a list of many other memory-inducing snapshots on my computer.

It’s from the first day of November, the day I was supposed to start NaNoWriMo*. Instead, my room got a thorough clean out and tidy up! I did end up writing to my word count that day, I think, but it still makes me laugh—that’s so typical of day one for me, the excitement and trepidation as one stands at the edge of a cliff, wings ready to glide, but unsure yet if the winds will be strong enough to keep you aloft.

After that initial day of procrastination with a little writing on the side, the rest of the month blurred into writing in every little tidbit of time I could snatch, sometimes staying up until 11:30 at night or later just so I could finish.

I didn’t intend to stay up late, on October 30th or 31st when I signed up for the challenge. “I’ll only do what I reasonably can,” I promised myself. “It’s okay if I don’t win. I’ll only write as much as I have the time for.”

Ha. And ha! again.

I tend to be the type to really appreciate a challenge, and try to win the game—no matter what it is.

And despite taking nine days off throughout the month due to one reason or another, the Lord was gracious and gave me enough words to make it through.

Otherwise, through the month, we held a fun birthday party/cookout for one of my brothers, I was away for seven days (one a three-day trip to the North Island—I must share some pictures from that!), and some friends of ours moved down into our area.

NaNo 2019 Progress Tracker — Day 20: When things really started to get serious on the writing front.

It was a lovely month, overall. I’m so grateful to have been able to write again. I write a little each day, a habit I’ve tried to develop just to keep my writing “muscles” toned somewhat and hopefully grow as a writer, but I feel like you can grow a lot more as a writer by doing more all at once.

I’ve had a hard time even explaining to myself why I wanted to do NaNo so much. Part of it, I know, is the camaraderie—the knowing that thousands of other people around the world are trying to reach the same goal you’re aiming for, many succeeding, but others falling back. Part of it is the sense of accomplishment—the feeling that you actually got somewhere in that short amount of time. And part is the creative challenge, although that’s the hardest. Sitting down each day and pouring your heart and soul into the story takes far more energy than I’d ever expect.

But it’s so worthwhile. I don’t feel myself growing as a writer from one scene to the next, or chapter to the next, or really even one story to the next—but I know I am. Little by little, I’m getting better. Info-dumping scenes are occuring a little less often and I’m experimenting with adding a bit more description, bringing a bit more color with words and characters and dialogue.

It’s not easy.

But it’s worth it.

And I hope the experience can continue far beyond NaNo this year! I haven’t been writing as much in December, but I am still averaging higher daily wordcounts than normal, which is nice. Even so, I’m looking forward to (maybe next month? or February?) when I can do something like this again. 1,667 words per day aren’t that difficult—a couple of hours, max—and the way the story comes together so much better when you invest that daily time really makes it worthwhile.

What have you been working on lately? If you’re a writer, have you ever done a writing challenge before? If not, what was your favorite part of your November?

*NaNoWriMo = National Novel Writing Month; a writing challenge that runs through the month of November with the goal of ending the month with 50,000 words or more written in a new book.

A Shout-Out to All Creators!

October 4, 2019 // Esther Filbrun 1 Comment

I don’t remember now how the conversation first started, but I got to talking with my younger brothers about a particularly annoying dragon in one of the stories I’d written. When met with blank faces, I realized they hadn’t ever heard the story, even though I wrote it for my siblings, intending to read it to them later!

My youngest brother immediately started campaigning for me to find it so I could read it to them, so over the last few weeks, I’ve taken time to do that now and then. We’re about half-way through the story now, which is significantly longer than I thought it would be (turns out it’s just under 20,000 words long!).

There have been two, no, three things that have struck me since starting to read this book aloud:

It’s not a bad thing to wait for a while to read through a book. I thought it was a fairly mediocre story soon after I wrote it, but waiting nearly two years to read it has changed my perspective quite a bit. I don’t know if I’d recommend waiting that long before you even read through your work for the first time, but you get a great perspective on the story—so much is new again!
I can write semi-funny things. I’ve laughed out loud several different times at unexpected happenings, and that’s a really fun discovery!
Some of my story ideas actually work. At least, for me and my family, which is the most important thing to me. I don’t know if this story will ever see the light of day in any editing/publishing roles, but I enjoyed the creation process, and I’m enjoying the sharing process, too.

Are you creating anything right now? Does it feel like absolute junk—like mine did? Keep working at it. Finish it. You never know what kind of gems you might find in your files years down the track!

Keep creating!

Standing on the Shoulders of Giants

October 25, 2018 // Esther Filbrun Leave a Comment

It’s always encouraging to hear from other writers. Back when I first started writing, I dived in head-first with little knowledge of story structure, character development, or even what the word “plot” or “novel” meant. That first year, especially, I spent reading everything I could on the subject. And though I’m sure I’ve forgotten most of what I learned then, I do remember the feeling of my world expanding exponentially, and the sure realization that I’d never look at anyone or anything the same way again.

There was a moment soon after I started writing for fun in longer form when I remember seeing a teenage girl being comforted—multiple times over a weekend—by an older friend of ours. Later, when I asked my parents about it, I explained that I wanted to know why she was doing that “because I might use it in my writing one day.” It turned out she had recently lost her brother, quite unexpectedly, and my heart went out to her.

But I knew then, even more than I had earlier, that life would never quite look the same again. I was a writer—was seeing life from the perspective of a writer—and that became a constant in my life.

Still, it’s good to hear from other people who are writers. They bring balance to my life.

I had forgotten how much I was missing out on until I got a chance to watch some encouragement from the last “season” of Indie Novelist Summit—which, in retrospect, I wish I had written about earlier, because wow. Some of that content is gold. I wish I could have shared it with you while it was still live! I’ve only watched one episode so far—one with Joanna Penn about writing mindset—but it’s set me down and shown me just how much I have yet to learn about the writing craft.

I love to write, love developing new characters under my fingers and watching them spring to life in gorgeous colors in my head.

However, I remember one time when I was probably six or seven, sitting at our grey, weathered picnic table under one of the biggest maple trees I’ve ever seen, a major feature in many childhood memories. I had a clean sheet of paper before me, a case of watercolor paints, and a beautiful picture in mind to paint. When I looked at my results a few minutes later, I remember feeling intense disappointment—though I had a picture in my head, I couldn’t translate it to the page.

Often, my writing feels that way too—a beauty of an idea, a meaningful thought, but poorly translated when it comes to writing.

Hearing from other creative writers refuels my tank, gives me the inspiration to keep going.

There was a phrase from Joanna Penn’s episode that has stuck with me:

“Stand on the shoulders of giants—know what has come before, so you can create something new.”

That’s what I’d like to do. I know that while my writing might not be great now, if I keep working at it, it’ll get better.

And that is why I’m thankful to still be able to write. And have the chance to learn from others who are also still learning—though obviously at a much more advanced level than me!

Who are you learning from right now? What are you learning?